Wednesday, August 26, 2020

Trump Team finds ideal focus group: Donald Trump

 In their desperate search of a focus group to test convention speakers with, the Trump Team made an amazing discovery. They had the ideal person to test ideas and speakers with all along: Donald Trump!

They did their homework. When they tested any item with a focus group of random Trump supporters, all 2016 Trump voters, and then compared the answers of the series of questions to those that Trump gave, they were identical. Whether it was the WALL, FOREIGNERS, THE PANDEMIC or JOE BIDEN, all the people thought exactly the same as Trump.

It was then easy to pass along this tip to the chosen convention speakers. Forget about the pig farmer in Iowa or the suburban gun toting McCloskeys. Just think of Donald Trump as your audience when you give your speech.


Thursday, August 13, 2020

Trump: Kamala will come after you!

 


Kamala Harris is a terrible politician. She’s just like Nancy Pelosi, they can’t take care of their own city and state. You know, she's very bad on facts. She's very weak on facts. And after she is elected, Kamala will come after you. She has a ridiculous gun reform plan. After that they will round up the Trump supporters.

The nasty woman is going to blame Covid-19 on me. That’s fair enough since I am president, but remember, Nancy Pelosi held a rally in Chinatown, was having a street party there and encouraged people to go to a big parade. I take credit for the testing and all that. The Coronavirus is very much under control in the USA. We are in contact with everyone and all relevant countries. CDC & World Health have been working hard and very smart. Stock Market starting to look very good to me! And Joe Biden is just hiding in his basement. Except for that short trip to announce Kamala from a high school stage

Kamala and Sleepy Joe Biden have not been friends. The Fake News Media is giving Kamala Harris a free pass despite her Radical Left failures and very poor run in the Democrat Primary. There was nobody meaner or more condescending to Slow Joe, not even me, and yet she quickly evaporated down to almost zero in the polls.

But there is a reason he picked her. He's essentially entered into a political living will now. He's made it clear that he plans to turn the reins over very quickly. And Kamala Harris will be the most liberal leftist nominee for VP that our country has ever seen. She is going to bring you socialized medicine. You know how well that works. Look at England. She's going to send the tax man after you for unpaid taxes. In my second term, you will pay almost no income tax, and no payroll tax.

Kamala Harris says she smoked weed in college while listening to Tupac & Snoop. But that does not make her cool, she’s a nasty woman! Do you want her putting your family in jail while she smokes pot in the White House?

Mike Pence will be reporting more on Kamala Harris this week. For instance, she is going to take red meat away from red blooded Americans. Does that make sense? No.

 


Sunday, August 2, 2020

25-Year Old Man Still Dreams of Being Drummer

York, PA -- Bill Bradford (25) of York, a factory worker, never gave up his dream of getting into rock and roll big time. At 15 he learned to play guitar but wasn’t as good as most his friends. He actually played bass for two years with local friends under several band names but mostly the same guys. They had occasional bookings. Then they all left for college except Bill.

Bill leafed thru Free Press ads for bass players, but they always wanted a singing bass player. Bill had no singing voice.


At 23 he taught himself drums, and trains in his divorced mother's garage as often as he can. He thinks he is pretty good now. "I'll get that big time chance any day now, then I can quit my job." He has never given up hope and is willing to take orders from "even that 17-year old that auditioned me last."

Because he is working fewer hours at the plant during the pandemic, Bill now has time to practice drums two days a week. He’s got some recording going on with musicians on the internet that want to sing or play an instrument for some Youtube or other similar video, and they want a live feel to the drums. Bill does not ask for credit on these, as most are too rough to be released versions. But some of these might yield gigs maybe in the spring.


Saturday, August 1, 2020

Trump signs executive order banning China and canceling The National Debt

It was a busy Saturday for Trump. Not happy just banning Tik Tok from the US, Trump has banned all of China. All of their China people can pack up and go home. To improve the failing economy Trump also canceled The National Debt. "They want to collect? Sue me," Trump stated and marched out of the Oval Office.


Friday, July 31, 2020

Area Man Fascinated by All Types of Masks

Area widower Hank Marwin, 62, is a bit bored. There is mowing to do once a week and some other yard work. And golf. But the rest of the time Hank spends reading about the pandemic, and especially the masks. Hank has bought every kind that was available to the general public.


He has bought funny ones, poiltical ones, head gear of all kinds for warding off the virus. Yet, most of the time he just goes out with the black washable mask, which he ordered three dozen of. But he can wear all kinds of gear. If his daughter wanted to take part in those protests, he has a gas mask for her.


Good quantities of disposable masks are stored on shelves in the garage. If neighbors run out, they just call Hank and he then opens the garage door for them to go and pick one they like. They call him back and he closes the garage door. He does not want to meet any of them. He does interact with them in sharing tomatoes and squash in a crate by the street. Masks and squash, that's Hank.

Wednesday, July 29, 2020

Nonprofits Having No Trouble Being Nonprofitable During Pandemic

Unlike businesses, which generally employ more people, nonprofits are having no trouble at all during the pandemic. Gary Killian, president of the Pennsylvania Land Trust says he is paying himself 30 hours at minimum wage for office work. 


"We had a founding member die during the pandemic, of unrelated causes, and it did require some legal work to transfer most of his savings to our Legacy Fund. We don't need to use it for land related issues right away. We can have substantial assets, as some years more land is acquired than others."

A children's foundation in Maine is receiving normal donations, and Kate and Allie are funneling the money to their usual recipient organizations.



Other foundations are directing research money to individual academics and state agencies with small crews taking care of environmental problems. There seems to be no end to causes that these liberal minded people come up with for their foundations.






Monday, July 27, 2020

Trump Signs Executive Order Declaring 2020 Election Illegal

President Trump has signed an executive order declaring the election illegal, if even one mail in ballot is counted.


"If your state has mail in votes, we won't count your state at all."

Claiming he has no time to deal with the election, and as he is in a deep fight with a massive left wing insurrection in several states, the administration is going to apply this simple rule to all states.

"Your governor has the authority to give all the electoral votes in your state to me, if you wish to be counted at all. I have put in an order to arrest Joe Biden, the leader of the insurrection we are fighting, so electoral votes for him could be counted. But he will be in jail at least to the end of this year."

Trump will not be leaving Washington in 2021. "I've put in an executive order for that as well. I can do that, you know."