New York, NY—Publisher denies wrongdoing. In the children’s book Porcupine’s Pajama Part by Terry Harshman, Mole prepares cookie dough, they eat it, place the remaining three cookies in the oven on page 27. Then they watch scary movies and on page 64, the three critters (including owl) go to bed together. Molly Hanson, 7, of Fairfield, OH, wrote in to alarm the publisher that “they never took the cookies out!” Molly offered to edit future books for a small salary.
London, U.K.--Beatles archivists unearth another 3 seconds of studio noise. In the noise can be heard a cough, a mutter, a lone guitar chord and one snare drum beat. Experts place these items somewhere in the second album recording sessions, though they were on a later tape, spliced at the end. The cough is attributed to McCartney and the mutter, all experts agree, is Lennon. This is the 27,003th archived studio noise bit where all 4 Beatles are believed to be present.
It appears that Hunter Biden's laptop has escaped from the FBI vault and has made its way into Russia.
Other tasks it has been looking into include turning off the natural gas going into Angela Merkel's house.
