Doing the best they could achieve, a team at Heritage Foundation looked for a way to change Clarence Thomas' driver's license to Caucasian on the ID part. It was not apparently leagal. So the team got everybody together and did the next best thing. For his 34 years on the Supreme Court and hard work on the conservative principles (burn coal and make muillionaires skip all tax), they named Clarence an honorary Caucasian.
Clarence can now go abroad and enjoy the finest clubs and events where black people have never been seen. Clarence will receive the award on Friday. He said he is quite grateful for this honor. Now, he could use an upgrade on his motor home. Clarence will be retiring at the end of 2028 so that Trump (or probably Vance) can name a new judge for the court.
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