Hunter Biden Laptop goes to work for Putin

It appears that Hunter Biden's laptop has escaped from the FBI vault and has made its way into Russia. 

The brave laptop is working hard on the Ukrainian border attempting to hack into Ukrainian servers to get information on Hunter Biden, Burisma and Zelinsky. Ultimately the laptop will be used to get the data on American voting machines to win the 2020 election for Trump.

Other tasks it has been looking into include turning off the natural gas going into Angela Merkel's house.

Putin has problems

Kyiv, Ukraine, May 30, 2022 -- With half of his army deserted and applying for residency in Ukraine, Putin has problems.

The Russians still in the country have given up fighting and are mostly distilling vodka from fermented garbage (their stock ran out). What to do, Putin? what to do?

House Republicans Preach: Take Resposibility, But Have A Moral Backbone!

 "You people do not need government help! Pick up yourself and apply yourself to some productive thing!"

The House Republicans remind you that America is the land of opportunity, get a job!  It is not the job of the Federal Government to hand you relief. Thousand points of light.

Also on Twitter this week House Republicans want all Americans to have the moral backbone to reject China. We must apply the same pressure to China as the Democrats are applying to Russia. Russia is a capitalist country. We must support them. We must not get involved with their border problems.

China is communist, they must be punished. Buy an Android phone, most of those are made outside of China. Not like the Apple phones Democrats like Hillary and Biden like to use. The human rights violations in China require us to cut off as much of the trade as possible.

Going a few days back, Republicans remind you:

-Republicans are working to protect parental rights and expand school choice, not empower the Federal Government or Far-Left teachers unions.

-Parents should have a voice in their child's education.

Anti-police rhetoric and defunding has led to a wave of violent crime against law enforcement officers. We must protect the men and women who risk their lives everyday to protect our communities.

-Biden and Inflation! Historical figures!

It goes on and on, forgetting Reagan had over 15% inflation.

Lauren Boebert Proud To Represent Your Guns in Congress

After serving in congress for a year (though it did happen after a Trump loss, so sad), Lauren Boebert is happy to report that she proudly represents your guns in congress. Please re-elect her this November if you want to continue this support of your guns.

Supreme Court Tells Biden: You Can't Do Stuff

 The Supreme court is still mulling over how to write it up, but Biden can't just "do stuff." It says in the constitution that:

"The executive Power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America. He shall hold his Office during the Term of four Years."

That seems to be national stuff. You know, running the country and controlling our enemies. Nowhere does it say he can put together vaccination and mask mandates. Those are state duties, police powers. "He might as well pack up all his OSHA stuff too", the court suggested.

And all this stuff with the attorney general. He can just go home too. The states run elections!

The conservative court has decided to side with state rights no matter what the case. Except for the 2nd Amendment. "Those rights are with the citizens." They don't really know what the words talking about militias mean.

Area Brain, of Loser, Thinks Strategy

The brain of area man Bill Miller has had to do some hard thinking. What is he ever going to achieve?

Bill has had some longer periods of cohabitation with females, but none of it led to anything. As far as the brain knows, they were all smart enough to use birth control.

In his various jobs Bill has done well enough, but basically he is just the average disposable worker, such as those at Amazon or the Goodwill store where he sorted clothing for a year.

So the brain does not want to make life hard for Bill and make him some kind of achiever. And the brain has enough work keeping Bill alive and safe. He does not need to have Bill pondering difficult tasks or have emotional issues related to work while driving a rather unreliable, and old, Toyota Corolla to the bar after work.

The brain thinks Bill will survive to almost the age of 50. Might as well make the best of it.

Professor Says Original Sons of Liberty Were Also Assholes

 Professor McMasters was lecturing to undergraduates about the events in Boston in the 1700s.

Though it seems the Continental Congress and Jefferson with his lofty Declaration were on the right track to declare independence, the earlier participants were mere rebel rousers. Not happy with Stamp Acts and tea taxes, the Sons of Liberty seem to have harassed simple British officials sufficiently that no Stamp Act was ever put into practice. "They just attacked the officials personally and ransacked their homes till they gave up.

Students were not convinced, and a couple wearing Trump hats walked out.