Samuel Alito rules in favor of Phlogiston

 With the federal agency EPA attempting to regulate air, the Supreme Court had to take action. After careful analysis of the science of 1700s Europe and America, Alito has decided that carbon dioxide was not a THING then. Therefore it cannot be regulated. It is not in the Constitution.

Alito does not want to leave the EPA completely without work. The elements are still there: air, fire and water. In particular, there were also gases known in the 1700s. Alito will throw a bone in the direction of the EPA and tells them in his latest opinion draft that they are to work on PHLOGISTON from now on.

Book Store Guy in Baseball Cap was Scholar

 

Kansas City, MO -- Stopping by the local Barnes and Noble store to get some school books, Pam Tillson and daughter Amy were looking at a copy of Merchant of Venice. A guy in a baseball cap, looking much like the store's barista, was taking a lot of space in front of the Shakespeare shelf. When he noticed them, he immediately started to give advice on editions. Turned out he was Shakespeare scholar named Barry from Oxford or something. He spoke a perfect British accent and could recite long parts of the dialogue. Amy, 14, was very charmed, as was mom.

Barry was done browsing and moved outdoors to one of the bookstore doorways that was not in use.