Trump signs executive order: Cars must produce CO2

 The Trump EPA has found a solution to the problem of electric cars. Cars must now produce carbon dioxide. Hydrogen buses are banned. Electric buses and cars are allowed, as long as the electricity is made by burning coal.

"Carbon dioxide is beneficial for plants, so we want to produce as much of that for our farmers as we used to. The windmills are now banned from any electricity that might go to cars. Also the word green is now banned for cars. In fact, even green paint will be phased out. I thank you for your attention."