Monday, September 7, 2015
Bear Coordinator bans Kentucky Bear Hunting
Frankfort, KY – Following the recent events surrounding federal law and stepping on Kentucky toes for marriage licences, State Bear Coordinator Sally Field, 45, has picked up the courage to announce there will be no bear hunting permits. She claims to be troubled by the killing of bears and is a vegtarian herself. She and her lesbian partner Myra have closed the office and made life safe for the 500-700 bears in the state. Hikers and travelers are allowed to carry weapons. This is Kentucky after all. And they are allowed to shoot a bear that attacks them. But they will then surrender the carcass to the state and the crime scene will be thorougly investigated. Rifle scopes and such will not be permitted. Also, shooting a bear a hunter ”thought was a deer” will carry a stiff fine. Sally and her partner will be out in the field working to protect mother bears and their cubs.
Sally has no authority to ban hunting completely and her decision does not get the backing of university ecologists. However, she is an elected official and the hunters will need the Kentucky legislature or the next ballot fo remove her.