Oregon Politician Not Able to say the G-word

Washington, DC -- A libertarian politician from Oregon likes to hang out in bars after work and is often asked what he is doing in Washington from Oregon. "I'm a lobbyist" is his standard answer.

The problem with Peter Longmire is that he hates government. He does not like any government, but he thinks the federal crooks are the worst. But here is the problem. Just like the crooks, he gets a paycheck from the government.

"I'm not here to pass any new laws. Not any laws that might be signed by Obama. I'm here to make sure no more federal restrictions are placed on individuals. I'm a lifetime NRA member."

When conversation at the bar gets to his favorite subjects, he hints that he might be able to "do something." They ask "like what?" He then asks them to name something specific.

As the evening moves along and the plans get crazier and crazier, he might let is slip that he is out there in "congress." He might be in Government, but certainly not working FOR the Federal Government. "I work for the people back home. We want the government out of there with the wild life refuge land. We can take care of a few birds and critters." Turning to his bar crowd he says: we'll shoot them!

Since he works for his voters in Oregon and gets a federal paycheck, he says he is not really taking anything away from Oregon. In fact he saves a lot of his salary and invests it back home.