Des Peres, MO -- An upstart plant has moved next to a patch of peonies planted in a suburban yard. The peonies have been there some thirty years since the house was built.
"You silly perennials! How do you expect to evolve if you just sit there 30 years. I came form Heidelberg in the Chucks that Johanna the exchange student in your house wears. I'm from Europe!" the plantain taunts them. One of the peonies looked up the weed and says that "even if he says he is a Plantago major, in English we call him common plantain."
The peonies closed up for the night and hoped that the owner would mow over the plantain in the grassy area as soon as possible.
Having just popped up for the first time, the plantain and peonies are in for a surprise next year. He is a perennial too.